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Dreamland Book Blog


Feena Casual


"Author of the Month" is a feature that I created to honour some of my favourite authors by featuring their works for an entire month!

This feature will:
  • Run for entire month. 
  • On every Sunday of the month (excluding the first week where I will have a blog post introducing and interviewing the author), there will be a blog post dedicated to the author. The content of the blog post is entirely up to the author's choice. 
  • The "Author of the Month" button will be displayed in my blog's sidebar during the entire duration. 
  • If you have any questions to ask the author(s), you can leave a comment below the blog post or privately message me at natshane94aa@gmail.com. 

For the entire month of March, I am proud to feature author L.Penelope.



Leslye Penelope believes love is magic and likes her romance with a healthy dose of imagination. She's been writing since she could hold a pen and is the author of new adult, fantasy and paranormal romance with multicultural characters.

After living on both coasts, she settled in Maryland with her husband and their furry dependents: an eighty pound lap dog and an aspiring feral cat. Sign up for new release information and monthly giveaways on her website: http://www.lpenelope.com.

Website & Social Media

http://lpenelope.com/

http://www.twitter.com/leslyepenelope

https://www.facebook.com/authorlpenelope

https://www.goodreads.com/lpenelope
Just Another Hand Regular


Just Another Hand Regular

In the Angelborn series, I created a world in which angels don't have souls. Souls are unique to  humans and require a human mother. Angelborn—half-angels born to an angel with a human father—don't have souls either. The only way for them to get one is to "bind" with a human and become their soul mate.

Writing stories in this world opens up a lot of possibilities, and part of the inspiration for book two, Angelfall, was the question of what would happen if an angel and an angelborn fell in love? Neither has a soul, but the consequences are much steeper for the angelborn. I'd introduced the character of Wren in book one as an angelborn stuck in the Wasteland and knew that I wanted to tell his story in book two. This required delving deeper into angel politics, life in the angel city of Euphoria, and their background and history. 


And while I'm not a historical writer, the fact that these angelic beings are ancient and have been coming to earth for eons was also really interesting to me. Which human events could really have been caused by conflicts invisible to us? If there are super powered beings among us, could that be the real reason behind natural disasters like typhoons and earthquakes? I play around with the cause of the devastating 1906 San Francisco earthquake in this book, an event I've always been fascinated by because it occurred on my birthday. Also because I lived in the San Francisco Bay Area for a few years and it's still one of my favorite places. 

I don’t remember the exact moment the story first came to me, but it was one of those times when I had to stop what I was doing, find a notebook and pen and start scribbling immediately. I saw two characters, new to the human world, exploring life and then something very tragic happened which had huge consequences not just for them, but for thousands and thousands of people. The story came out really quickly as the characters took on lives of their own. Here’s an exclusive excerpt from Angelfall. 




“We should go,” Lyrix says.


“But we still have half a cycle left on our shift.”


“No, Wren, I mean we should go to the human world. We should experience what it’s like.”


Thrills of excitement and fear thread their way through me. But the more I’m around her, the 


more questions I have. My memories of being among humans are locked away. Touch, smell, 


taste—these are all just vague notions. I blocked them from my mind in order to survive in 


Euphoria without them, but now I wonder. What human form would Lyrix choose? What would 


she smell like? What would she feel like?


“Go together?” I ask, needing to be sure.


“Of course. It seems like a frightening thing to do alone, but it would be an adventure with 


you.”


“An adventure?” I repeat dumbly.


“Like this.” She holds up a bit of data. “‘Italian prince, Rodolfo Velluvio—first to climb Mt. 


Zailaniryana. He made it to the top in three weeks and planted his flag at the summit.’ We could 


be like that, going where no one has gone before and planting our flags.”


“Angels have gone to the human world for millions of cycles.”


“Yes, but never together. Think of all the things we could experience.”


I focus back on my section of the stream, the longing within me having no place to go. “It 


would be dangerous.”


"Other angelborn have gone, have they not?"


"Yes, there are those who have risked life away from the Flame. But remember, it is different 


for us. Away from the Flame our powers eventually fade to nothing. We become fully human 


with no souls. Some are lucky—they fall in love with a human and bind with them to share their 


soul. They're reborn together, two bodies with one soul, again and again, but others..." I shake 


my head, and Lyrix's light weakens, her sadness over that grim fate apparent.


“It won't get to that point, Wren. We would be sure to return before your powers diminished. 


I wouldn’t risk you dying there soulless and being sent to the Wasteland.”


“Would the Seraphim even allow it?”


She grabs my arm with both hands, startling me into dropping the pearl I’d just picked up. As 


humans, we could touch all the time and no one would think anything of it. No one would darken 


with disapproval or stare the way they do here when Lyrix brushes against me. Plus, I would be 


able to feel it with skin and muscle and bone, far more deeply than even my light-made-solid 


angel form could. But if that wasn’t enough to sway me, the emphatic voice she uses does it.


“I have to be back for the next Adjustment," she says. "Until then, I can do what I like—I 


don’t see why exploring the human world would be off limits.” She fades sharply. The sight 


wounds me. “It is my duty to become a Seraph—my destiny. This will be my only chance to ever 


experience real life. Please say you will come with me.”


I cover her hands with my own, trapping her against me. Though I’m aware of the contact 


between us, it isn’t true sensation. There’s no temperature, no texture. The most we can 


experience here is a just a shadow of what it would be like with human bodies.


I would never have done it on my own, but Lyrix’s pleading makes me realize how much I 


want to. Perhaps have always wanted to.


“Yes, I’ll go with you,” I say.


She shines, making no attempt to hide her feelings or fit in with the rest. For a moment, I 


give up the pretense as well. We gleam, both of us, until we’re brighter than the Eternal Flame.

Miltonian  Regular 
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Tuesday, March 29, 2016 No comments

Feena Casual


"Author of the Month" is a feature that I created to honour some of my favourite authors by featuring their works for an entire month!

This feature will:
  • Run for entire month. 
  • On every Sunday of the month (excluding the first week where I will have a blog post introducing and interviewing the author), there will be a blog post dedicated to the author. The content of the blog post is entirely up to the author's choice. 
  • The "Author of the Month" button will be displayed in my blog's sidebar during the entire duration. 
  • If you have any questions to ask the author(s), you can leave a comment below the blog post or privately message me at natshane94aa@gmail.com. 

For the entire month of March, I am proud to feature author L.Penelope.


Leslye Penelope believes love is magic and likes her romance with a healthy dose of imagination. She's been writing since she could hold a pen and is the author of new adult, fantasy and paranormal romance with multicultural characters.

After living on both coasts, she settled in Maryland with her husband and their furry dependents: an eighty pound lap dog and an aspiring feral cat. Sign up for new release information and monthly giveaways on her website: http://www.lpenelope.com.

Website & Social Media

http://lpenelope.com/

http://www.twitter.com/leslyepenelope

https://www.facebook.com/authorlpenelope

https://www.goodreads.com/lpenelope

Just Another Hand RegularMiama Regular

I don't usually write to music, but sometimes I make an exception. My normal writing process is to get away from my home office and move to the living room couch with my laptop. If I'm home alone then I often write in silence, but sometimes I like to have the illusion of other people around. That's when I go to https://coffitivity.com. I turn up the coffee shop sounds, which trick my mind into thinking there are others around.

A lot of writers will go to an actual coffee shop, but that would be a fifteen to twenty-minute drive, at least for me, and that forty minutes round trip is time I could be writing. Plus, I drink a lot of tea while writing, and I hate the awkward internal negotiation of whether or not to pack up all my stuff just to go to the bathroom at a cafe, or just trust the strangers around me not to steal anything. Which is why I usually write at home unless I'm going somewhere with another person.

However, some scenes or characters require a soundtrack. Angelborn was like that. I created a very short playlist on Spotify with songs that I played in the background while writing Maia's scenes. I would just repeat the songs over and over again during my writing sessions and let them sink into my brain.

With certain scenes in other books, I've used classical music or listened to other genres that didn't have lyrics. Normally, songs with words distract me while I'm writing, but something about Maia's character just needed music and lyrics. I was able to tune out the words when necessary and listen in when I took a break. Here is the playlist I used:


The process of writing each book is always a little different for me. Sometimes it's surprising, but I'm happy to go with it and let it flow.

Tuesday, March 22, 2016 No comments

Feena Casual


"Author of the Month" is a feature that I created to honour some of my favourite authors by featuring their works for an entire month!

This feature will:
  • Run for entire month. 
  • On every Sunday of the month (excluding the first week where I will have a blog post introducing and interviewing the author), there will be a blog post dedicated to the author. The content of the blog post is entirely up to the author's choice. 
  • The "Author of the Month" button will be displayed in my blog's sidebar during the entire duration. 
  • If you have any questions to ask the author(s), you can leave a comment below the blog post or privately message me at natshane94aa@gmail.com. 

For the entire month of March, I am proud to feature author L.Penelope.


Leslye Penelope believes love is magic and likes her romance with a healthy dose of imagination. She's been writing since she could hold a pen and is the author of new adult, fantasy and paranormal romance with multicultural characters.

After living on both coasts, she settled in Maryland with her husband and their furry dependents: an eighty pound lap dog and an aspiring feral cat. Sign up for new release information and monthly giveaways on her website: http://www.lpenelope.com.

Website & Social Media

http://lpenelope.com/

http://www.twitter.com/leslyepenelope

https://www.facebook.com/authorlpenelope

https://www.goodreads.com/lpenelope

I love paranormal and fantasy novels because they always take you to a new world, or a hidden part of our own world. When I first got the idea for Angelborn, I knew that it needed to take place in modern times. I wanted to create an urban environment populated with angels and ghosts. But I also needed other realms for the supernatural creatures. Most of the story would not take place there, but I had to flesh them out and make them feel real.

A big part of creating a story world includes asking question over and over again. Why do ghosts exist? Why do angels exist? Where do they come from? Why? What do they want? How do they interact? What do they think about humans? There have to be reasons, even if you never delve that deep into them inside the book. 
Sunday, March 13, 2016 2 comments

Feena Casual


"Author of the Month" is a feature that I created to honour some of my favourite authors by featuring their works for an entire month!

This feature will:
  • Run for entire month. 
  • On every Sunday of the month (excluding the first week where I will have a blog post introducing and interviewing the author), there will be a blog post dedicated to the author. The content of the blog post is entirely up to the author's choice. 
  • The "Author of the Month" button will be displayed in my blog's sidebar during the entire duration. 
  • If you have any questions to ask the author(s), you can leave a comment below the blog post or privately message me at natshane94aa@gmail.com. 

For the entire month of March, I am proud to feature author L.Penelope.




Leslye Penelope believes love is magic and likes her romance with a healthy dose of imagination. She's been writing since she could hold a pen and is the author of new adult, fantasy and paranormal romance with multicultural characters.

After living on both coasts, she settled in Maryland with her husband and their furry dependents: an eighty pound lap dog and an aspiring feral cat. Sign up for new release information and monthly giveaways on her website: http://www.lpenelope.com.

Website & Social Media

http://lpenelope.com/

http://www.twitter.com/leslyepenelope

https://www.facebook.com/authorlpenelope

https://www.goodreads.com/lpenelope
Josefin Sans Regular

Hello Leslye! It’s a pleasure to have you on my blog and I’m beyond excited to have the chance to interview you today! I am a huge fan of Angelborn and I knew it was the kind of book I couldn't get out of my system. It was that addicting (review to come soon!). Without further ado, 

Let’s start off with the customary questions, tell us more about yourself and how you started off with your writing journey? 

I've been writing fiction since my mother first taught me to write at age five. I still have the first "novel" I wrote in kindergarten about a boy with a magic clock. I guess I loved fantasy even back then. 

All throughout childhood I participated in summer writing workshops and took whatever creative writing classes my school offered. In high school, I was the co-editor of our literary magazine after having been on staff all four years. But it wasn't until 2008 that I re-energized my passion. I'd just gotten married and moved to a new city where I knew no one. I saw a flyer for writing classes and signed up almost immediately. Being in a regular writing group helped me focus on my stories again and in 2013 I started writing my first novel, Song of Blood & Stone. 

Fantasy books are one of my go-to genre when I’m in the mood for reading, what made you decide to venture into fantasy land and subsequently creating Angelborn? 

I've always been drawn to fantasy and sci-fi—speculative fiction in general. I grew up loving shows like The Twilight Zone and The Outer Limits and got heavily into reading sci-fi in college. Almost all of my creative work is somehow in the speculative genre. 

Several years ago, during NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) I began working on a novel in which a girl fell in love with an invisible boy. That story went through several iterations, but I never finished it. Angelborn is another take on the same theme, but in a very different form to that original story. 

Maia is my favourite character because she was kind-hearted despite her dark, brooding demeanor. Her selflessness was what made her personality stood out. Tell us more about the characters and what inspired their personas? :)

All of my heroines to date have been struggling with feelings of isolation and defining their identity. Maia is no different. When I thought about what it would be like to never know if the people around you were living or dead—which is what Maia struggles with—it seemed like a very lonely life. Her personality has been defined in reaction to this thing that sets her apart, but had things gone another way, she would be very different. Part of the love story is about her finding someone who can see past the barriers she's put up to the person locked inside. 


If you can be any character in your book, who would you be and why? 

I'm not sure I'd want to be any of them, I do put them through a lot. :) If I had to choose, I'd probably pick Helix because he always seems like he's having fun, even when he's being kind of awful. 


What’s your favourite type of angel? Why? 

While the Recordkeepers sound boring to some, they're privy to virtually all of human (and angel) history. There's so much fascinating information stored in the Archive that they get to access, so I think they're my favorite. 


What is the one trait that you liked most about angels? 

The angels in my series aren't inherently good or bad. They all have jobs to do in order to maintain their way of life and everyone is expected to contribute. It's sort of an 'all for one' philosophy which I'm drawn to. 


I am in awe with your writing, what are the other works that you have previously and/or currently working on? 

Thank you! There are three planned books in the Angelborn Cycle, with the third coming out later this year. I have another series of full length, fantasy romance novels called the Earthsinger Chronicles, the first book is Song of Blood & Stone. That series takes place in an alternate 1920s-type world of magic and war. Right now I'm working on books three in both series. 


If you can have an actor/actress portraying your characters, who would they be? 

I do "cast" my characters when writing so I can keep a visual in my head. Sometimes I'll use actors, but more often I use models. For Angelborn, I needed a black goth girl for Maia and found the perfect person on the Afropunk.com website. She was just a regular person, but gave me the Maia vibe. Model Sacha M'baye was my Caleb, and actress Alexandra Shipp (the new Storm in the upcoming X-Men Apocalypse movie) was Genna. 


Now for some fun fact questions! If you can have any supernatural/mythical creature as your boyfriend, what would it be and why? 

I've been reading a ton of bear shifter books recently, so I think a growly shifter would be pretty cool. And while he's not an actual shifter, my husband and I joke about the fact that he has mutant powers. He's a crazy good animal whisperer. Dogs and cats.


Name the top 5 things you are most afraid of. 
Locked-in syndrome, fish bones, bees, super EMP blast, Donald Trump

Sunday, March 06, 2016 2 comments
Feena Casual

"Author of the Month" is a feature that I created to honour some of my favourite authors by featuring their works for an entire month!

This feature will:

  • Run for entire month. 
  • On every Sunday of the month (excluding the first week where I will have a blog post introducing and interviewing the author), there will be a blog post dedicated to the author. The content of the blog post is entirely up to the author's choice. 
  • The "Author of the Month" button will be displayed in my blog's sidebar during the entire duration. 
  • If you have any questions to ask the author(s), you can leave a comment below the blog post or privately message me at natshane94aa@gmail.com. 
For the entire month of February, I am proud to feature author Amalie Silver.


Miama Regular



Amalie Silver resides in Minnesota with her husband, two toddlers, and German Short-haired Pointer, Saba. She consumes approximately three pots of coffee a day, and credits this for her survival over the past decade. When not completely consumed in her writing, she can be found taking road trips to northern Minnesota, engaging in fierce Scrabble games, or reading a good book. She’s a sucker for all romance genres, literary fiction, and psychological fiction.


Contact her through: 

Website: 
https://amaliesilver.wordpress.com/

FB:
https://www.facebook.com/amaliesilver

IG:
https://www.instagram.com/amalie_silver/

Twitter:
https://twitter.com/AmalieSilver





First of all, I would like to apologize for the delayed AOTM post that was due Sunday and a heartfelt gratitude to author Amalie Silver for being so supportive and helpful in making this post despite the short notice (she's really awesome! :D ) Anyway, I would like to thank all of you for participating in my blog's February AOTM feature and taking the time to check out the contents, for our last AOTM post for the month of February, we thought that it would be a great idea to feature a post dedicating to "insecurities", as that is the major theme of Progress and what most of us are familiar with today. Without further ado, keep on reading to find out what author Amalie Silver has to say! 

Loving ourselves isn’t always easy. Sometimes it takes a lifetime. But never underestimate the journey that gets us there.


I was asked to write a low self-esteem piece for Dreamland to promote my new book, Progress. At first I wrote something superficial; it didn’t exactly give anyone a snapshot into the mind of those of us with low self-esteem. In fact, it read more like a medical journal on the psychological effects of bullying.

Nothing about it felt real.

So I began again. I scratched the first piece and rewrote this to speak to all the women out there who are living in their life feeling like they’re never good enough.

Because there will always be a part of me that feels that way.

Wednesday, March 02, 2016 2 comments

Feena Casual


"Author of the Month" is a feature that I created to honour some of my favourite authors by featuring their works for an entire month!

This feature will: 
  • Run for entire month. 
  • On every Sunday of the month (excluding the first week where I will have a blog post introducing and interviewing the author), there will be a blog post dedicated to the author. The content of the blog post is entirely up to the author's choice. 
  • The "Author of the Month" button will be displayed in my blog's sidebar during the entire duration. 
  • If you have any questions to ask the author(s), you can leave a comment below the blog post or privately message me at natshane94aa@gmail.com. 

For the entire month of February, I am proud to feature author Amalie Silver.



Amalie Silver resides in Minnesota with her husband, two toddlers, and German Short-haired Pointer, Saba. She consumes approximately three pots of coffee a day, and credits this for her survival over the past decade. When not completely consumed in her writing, she can be found taking road trips to northern Minnesota, engaging in fierce Scrabble games, or reading a good book. She’s a sucker for all romance genres, literary fiction, and psychological fiction.

Contact her through: 


Website: 
https://amaliesilver.wordpress.com/

FB:
https://www.facebook.com/amaliesilver

IG:
https://www.instagram.com/amalie_silver/

Twitter:
https://twitter.com/AmalieSilver








Part I
Progress: Interrupted



On the way home that night, I hit a baby white rabbit. I looked in the rearview mirror and saw the life ripped from its fragile body, peppering the pavement with white and red pieces of innocence.

We all have to live with the choices we make. Some seem brilliant at the time, and some mistakes we realize right away. Regret isn’t something that disappears, it is something that lives inside of us and alters every path we take from that point on. Sometimes it can be beautiful, and sometimes it’s anything but.

For as proud as I felt about my decision to leave, there hasn’t been a day since that I haven’t wondered what would’ve happened if I had stayed.

I can’t help but think: perhaps I’d started that year beautiful and ended up ugly.

-Charlie



Chapter One


Jesse


The fury bubbled slowly. It started in my gut and extended out to every limb until my hands balled into fists at my sides. Charlie walked out of my bedroom door and down my steps. The sound of the front door sealed my fate.
I couldn’t believe she did it.
Come back.
I waited in hope that she might change her mind, and that this wasn’t a strange fairy tale with a wicked and unforeseeable end. I’d given Charlie everything I had to offer. But it wasn’t good enough.
I wasn’t good enough.
The small clock on my nightstand echoed with each tick, making the room feel smaller. The silence in the house made my head spin, my heart rate spike, and my teeth grind. But it wasn’t until I walked to the window and watched her open her car door that it settled in.
You can’t do this to me.
The snow had stopped falling, leaving her green car covered in water. With clouds in the sky, the moon’s presence lingered with a faint glow.
She rubbed her forehead and licked her lips. Glancing up quickly, she saw me standing in the window and looked down again before ducking into the driver’s seat.
And then she was gone.
What had I done wrong? What was the past year for? It wasn’t fair.
The more I thought, the more I paced. I threw on a pair of sweatpants and another surge of adrenaline fought with a contradicting lump in my throat. I’d chosen the wrong girl to trust. She had systematically broken me down over the past twelve months to where there wasn’t anything I wouldn’t do for her. I would’ve maimed, died, killed if she asked me to.
But leaving her alone wasn’t something I’d considered. Could I do it? Was it best for her? For me?
There was no way it could end like this. She didn’t know me at all if she thought I’d allow it.
For every tear, every cigarette, every heartbeat, and every breath, she’d taken what she needed and left me standing with my dick in my hand. She was selfish and cruel. Mean and callous.
She’d become me. And I’d become her. The sensitive had become volatile and the volatile had become sensitive.
Goddammit. This snuck up on me.
More meds. That’s what she needed me to do. More meds, more soft kisses, more compliments, more dates, more meds. That’s what she needs me to do. More meds.
I ran through the hallway, jumped down the steps, and sped into the kitchen. Digging through the cupboard to find the medication I hadn’t taken in months, I dropped bottles of painkillers to the counter. My hands were clumsy and the same words cycled in my head.
 “Where are they, where are they, where are they?”
I found the bottles, tore off their caps, and ran the water. The three pills sat in my shaky palm, and for as hard as I tried to keep it still, my mind wouldn’t allow it.
The searing pain in my side returned, and I closed my hand into a fist around the pills. Bottles of painkillers lay on top of dirty dishes surrounding me. The cold water sprayed against the sink and I swore I could still hear the ticking of the clock on my nightstand.
Madness.
My mind went blank and my anger surged. I threw the pills across the room and tore the cupboard door from its hinges. The sound of my heartbeat drowned out the noises, and my rage was fueled by my hatred for Charlie. The circumstances. The outcome. The faith I’d had in her.
Dishes, bottles, vases—anything within my reach I flung against the bookshelf on the other side of the room, but I couldn’t hear them crash. So I tried again.
Whiz. Chirp. Swish. Honk.
I yanked on the edge of the dining table and flipped it upside down, followed by each chair. My shoulders were tight, every muscle in my face felt strained, and the rush of spins to my head made it feel like I was on the other side of the room watching myself destroy it.
But I didn’t give a shit.
I flipped the television but barely heard the crash to the floor. I tore the drapes from the windows, the books from the shelves, and the paintings from the walls.
Not deserving her was one thing; my temper, my moods, and my impulsive behavior had always gotten me into trouble. But I’d never asked for anything. I’d never wanted anything like I wanted her. And I’d fucking tried. I’d tried so damn hard to keep her, but in the end she didn’t care. She didn’t believe me. She thought she was smarter than me.
I took heavy breaths, pausing to see the damage I’d done to the room. I couldn’t think. My mind wasn’t allowing for the regret and consequences; it only made room to obsess over what the past two hours had done to me.
The walls of Dennis’s house were chipped and cracked. The glass from windows, dishes, and pictures was scattered over the carpet. The television was fucked, along with the small table it had sat upon.
My fingertips were bloody. Small scrapes stung in the cool air coming in from the window, and I stared at my hands, welcoming the pain.
Fuck you, Charlie.
I tried to get the words out of my head, but nothing else would stick. My mind spiraled, my body shook, and I bit down on my tongue until I could taste blood.
I ran upstairs and stopped at the threshold of my bedroom door to catch my breath.
She was here. Just a moment ago.
And now I’ve lost her.
I walked to the edge of my bed and stared down at the messed sheets. It had been a place I’d taken dozens of women, and it hadn’t been special; it hadn’t been sacred.
Fuck you, Charlie.
What had she done to me? Who does something like that?
I picked up a pillow and buried my face in it, smelling her faded perfume. I closed my eyes and went back to the first time I met her. A timid mouse behind the cash register. The pizza was for Olson. It was pepperoni and mushrooms. She wore a wrinkled Crimson T-shirt. Her lipstick was faded. It was raining that night, delivery was busy. She was guarded, uneasy. Prey.
I could remember every moment with her. For the first time in my life, I could remember things. The clarity Charlie gave me, the way she didn’t assume, her red hair, those damn blue eyes…
She was gone.
Like the rest of them.
I grabbed my chest, slid down to my knees, and let it consume me. She’d warned me this was coming; she’d said she wouldn’t be another victim of mine. But I thought I could show her, prove to her, convince her that the way I felt about her was different from anyone who had come before her. If I loved her hard enough, the rest would fall into place.
My body gave out and I slouched on the floor. I stared into the sea of dirty clothes, resting my bloody fingertips on my knees.
“I won’t live a life in love that requires me to stay on guard and cower in the corner,” she’d said. “Love isn’t the place you go when there’s nowhere left to run.”
It was too much.
I couldn’t process the words, our friendship, and the pounds of regret keeping my chest in a constant state of heaviness. I traced the wavy lines of my tattoo, remembering all the damage Charlie had done and dismissing the light she’d brought.
My head hung low, between my knees, and I kept my eyes shut.
“What the ever-loving fuck?”
I looked toward my door at the sound of Jake’s voice from downstairs.
“Shit,” I mumbled, bouncing to a stand and grabbing a shirt from my floor. I pulled my arms through, noticing a smear of blood covering the tattoo on my arm, already dry and brown. I froze, and looked down in thought.
“Jesse Fucking Anders! Where the fuck are you?” Jake bellowed through the house. “I’m going to kill you!” His voice rumbled through the walls and down the hallway, and I quickly grabbed my shoes and keys.
“I’m here,” I said, walking down the steps.
Jake stood in the middle of the shitstorm, assessing the wreck I’d caused. I kept my head down and slipped on my shoes.
“You want to explain this to me?” Jake’s voice cracked.
“Not now. I gotta go.”
His face was red and his eyes bugged out. “What? Hell no.” He breathed heavily and shook his head. “You’re not going anywhere until you tell me who trashed my dad’s house.”
I shrugged. “I did.” Jogging down the steps, I grabbed my coat just before I got to the door.
“That’s all you’re going to say? No explanation?” He stood at the edge of the steps and looked down at me, but I kept my head down.
“Not now. I have to take care of something.” I opened the door and stepped out into the cold night air.
“Fine! That’s how it’s gonna be? Jesus, you’re an asshole. You’ve got one week to find a new place to live,” Jake shouted through the door just as I shut it behind me.

***

A moment so fragile that if I move or speak, the whole thing will collapse.
So I’ll just sit here, in this dirty chair, in a place that shouldn’t be open at midnight, and listen to a new song in my head.
The click.
The screech.
The crumble.
The buzz.

I’ll watch. I’ll remember the vibration of the needle as it collides with the layers of my skin, giving me a different kind of hope. One that I can make for myself.

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Sunday, February 21, 2016 No comments
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Hi! I'm Natasha! A twenty-something-year-old who has way too many hobbies and passions for her own good. I'm recently into drawing (hence, artmateur), binging shows on Netflix, reading romance novels and stalking Pinterest board for my next project.

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Booty Camp Dating Service
it was amazing
Booty Camp Dating Service
by Debra Anastasia
Finding Dandelion
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Finding Dandelion
by Lex Martin
Saven Disclosure
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Saven Disclosure
by Siobhan Davis
Dearest Clementine
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Dearest Clementine
by Lex Martin
Killer Potential
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